Friday, December 27, 2013

16 week!

After a few weeks into the second trimester, I am finally feeling better from nausea and sudden hunger pains. I feel a little more like my old self again now that my appetite is pretty stable and my food cravings don't seem as much of an emergency. Like I said in the announcement post, I had a very rough first trimester this time around. I was struggling with this constant sadness and felt like crying and depressed most nights. I was scared and felt helpless to see my body change and was definitely not ready to gain weight.After dee was weaned, I started working really hard to keep a healthy lifestyle. I was doing cardio and strength training consistently at home. I was eating right with the kids. I felt good. For the first time in my life, I felt good about myself and how I looked in the mirror. But then the baby came, and everything I've worked so hard for was getting thrown out the window. I was so bitter and sad. And mad at myself that I was so vain to still struggle with body image issues like back in high school. I know it might sound ridiculous to let stuff like this get to me when it's my third pregnancy, but it was all very real. I'm feeling better now, though. I've started wearing maternity clothes again and have invested in a couple new pieces since my old ones were so beat up after 2 pregnancies. And, as vain as it sounds, it made me happy :)

Seriously though, now that I'm emotionally normal again (kind of), I am just very thankful that God has give me a healthy body for the baby to grow in. We are getting excited around here, too! Both Zoey and Dee got it, and they are getting impatient that the baby is so small and growing so slowly :) Z really wants a baby sister so she can name her Emma, and Dee loves laying on my tummy to be close to the baby. Gary and I have been brainstorming about baby names, too. We can't wait to find out what this baby is! 4 more weeks! :)

Gary and I came to Portland by ourselves yesterday and we are spending the weekend alone without the kids. I had mixed feelings before we left and I'm missing them so much! But it's been a really nice break. It actually took me awhile to get used to the fact that I am not needed by someone else and I can go about my daily routines and to-do list at my own pace. After that, I realize I am in some sort of wonderland ;-) I can brush my teeth and wash my face in peace, and I get to study and write a blog post. We've done a lot of productive shopping around here, eaten lots of good food, and watched a 3-hour long movie in a movie theatre! We are seriously so blessed to have my parents, my aunt, and Gary's parents to help out this weekend with the kids. Luckiest couple right here :))

Some pictures we've taken during our trip here::
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