I think I have done myself a disservice! I trained for 6 months in 2013. I went from couch to 5k, then 5k to 10k and 10k to half marathon. I kept up my running, even after the cold settled in. 13 degrees was the coldest I pushed myself.The dark morning and dark evening hours were my only choice toto run.
I moved the day before Thanksgiving, which changed my running dynamics. I no longer ran my familiar and quiet route I've grown attached to for many months. I was pretty excited to have a new route, right out my front door, until I chose an evening and early morning run. There is too much traffic in my new neighborhood. Main thoroughfares and cross roads. The plus, is less hills and actual
"city trails" marked by Lees Summit. They are paved and well lit.
I like running in the dark. I don't know why. The dark offers peace, quite and less distraction. Early mornings when a soul isn't around and I can hear my thoughts, my heart beat and the pace of my breath.
I want to find new trails; paved and unpaved. I want to run with people, then I want to run alone too. With people, I have to keep up conversation and I'd rather not. I have to hear my breath and my footsteps. I don't have anything to say when I am running. I am working out the battle in my head. When I am alone, I want a running buddy. Someone I don't have to explain anything too. BLAH!
I have given myself such a huge break at Christmas, I find myself with lack of motivation. Ha! Did I say Christmas? NOT-SO-MUCH! Um, lets say December 1 through now! I wanted to give my body a rest from the rigorous running, my mind a break from strict bed times and alarm times. I wanted a sense of peace and being organic with my sleep and very little activity.Hmmm, I got my wish. Now I have a huge problem on my hands. I was so used to going to sleep at 8:30-9pm at night and up at 4:30, which is completely abnormal for me. I have, in the past 3 weeks, stayed up until 11 pm and woke at 7. Woke, being a light word, I must admit. I have pried myself out of bed at 7 am the last 2 weeks, so I don't get used to sleeping until 8 am.
I set my alarm this morning at 4:30, so I could give myself ample time to get to 6 am yoga. Yes, I dearly miss that class. I talked myself into resetting the alarm at 3 am. I woke up at 6:20 instead. Good grief!!! No alarm, and no yoga. I am tired as ever. I DID paint my entire living room in 3 hours last night. Surprisingly, I am quite sore. Speed painting should be an Olympic sport! HA HA! but, I am guessing that doesnt count towards my running plan. Sadly.
Sunday begins my 12 week training for my next half marathons series. 3 half marathons in a 5 week time frame. I have paid for this, I WANT to do it, however, my motivation stinks.
I am going to need every ounce of God's help on this. Re-discipline. I guess bootcamp style?? My alarm should be set for no later than 5am, each day of the week. I guess i'll be tired enough to get my rear in bed when I can barely hold my eyelids open!
What do you do when the battlefield is going on in your head? I WANT TO, yet, I back out the last minute. I FEEL better when I do, yet, getting started is worse than I imagined.
I think women have it worse. It takes us longer, we have more on our plates than men. We tend to over commit to daily life things. Then, exercise... UGH, I think trying on swimsuits sounds more fun.
Oh my, I just paused, I typed swim suits. Really? NOOOO THANK YOU! I'd rather run!
Ok, just got my motivation word planted! SWIMSUIT!
I CAN DO THIS!!
5 AM, I CAN DO THIS... 5 AM, I WILL DO THIS... 5AM, WILL BE THE NEW ME 2014.. GIVE ME 2 WEEKS!
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