One word review of the Breaking Bad finale: Fitting.
Unlike most shows, Breaking Bad didn't use its final season as a hype-train for its final episode. They were too busy robbing it. Instead of building towards a big reveal to blow us away, Vince Gilligan and friends decided to treat the end of the Walter White saga like the chemistry experiment that was at the core of the entire series: Formulaic. And that's not a bad thing
In a season wrought with failed hypotheses, eventually, through extreme trial and error, Walt was able to find the perfect mixture of elements to produce the outcome he was seeking. It was the anti-Sopranos ending. No ambiguity. No questions left to ask. We witnessed what happened, and that's that.
, I mentioned once the series came to its conclusion, that inevitably, the nitpicking would begin, and it has. Some have pontificated that it was a let down because it was just too easy for Walt. After five and fifteen-sixteenths seasons of breaking bad, things finally broke his way. It was a neatly packaged, nuts and bolts, satisfying conclusion. Anyone expecting new desert to be dug up with an hour remaining just didn't want the story to come to an end. Because the entire run of the series was like Heisenburg's trademark Blue, as close to pure as you can get, on something produced synthetically. No step was skipped along the way; every scene mattered. If each part of the process wasn't treated with the proper precision, the end result simply wouldn't have been to the highest standard. In many ways, Breaking Bad is the same as Fantasy baseball: No section is worth more or less than another; they're all equally important pieces of the final result.
The meticulous attention paid towards the quality of the show throughout created a general sense of malaise during the finale. If you wanted to, just think of the penultimate episode as the real series finisher, and the last hour (and 15 minutes) as an almost "best of" covering all the fun Breaking Bad provided over its run: ,, ,and, probably most important,was all there. Plus, it provided the resolution we were clamoring.
But now it's in the past. And it's time to surge into the future. There are new shows to watch. Where to start though?
Well, that's a real conundrum. Breaking Bad reached a level of uniform reverence that just isn't prevalent with TV shows.
Everyone's taste is different. The subjective nature of fiction leads to an incredible amount of wavering opinions, but really, it's not unlike the evaluation of a player's Fantasy value. We all pick and choose the things we believe about someone's skill set and what we consider irrelevant. Some defer to players inside a great offense. But maybe you're a matchups man, a skills guy or one of those that believe apostrophes in first names translates into Fantasy glory. The unpredictably of football makes these modes of evaluation entirely possible, except that last one. That's insaneand hilarious.
But everyone needs a launching point.
Lists are great. And while I'm no Liam Nesson, , or his second in command, Bleacher Report, I do enjoy a good descending (or ascending. Or just a non-power ranked copulation, for that matter) collection of similar topic as much as any one else. In fact, I probably have a greater attachment to them. Hell, the rankings at the bottom of the page are basically the only reason people click on this column every week. So thank you lists.
So here's a series of series to ponder for your next watch. Some are ripe with bingeability others are a slow burn, but all are like someone on your Fantasy squad. And if you have Netflix or aren't!!! You can bang these out quicker than the Giants fell out of contention.
ADRIAN PETERSON IS MODERN FAMILY
Is ADRIAN PETERSON really the best player in Fantasy? Probably not. But, year-after-year he is consistently amount the best. Usually, there's not much separation between the top running back and the fifth highest scorer, but you can always count on AP to be one of those five guys. No one else is really in that conversation. That's why he was the unanimous first pick - He always delivers, making Peterson an easy pick.
Modern Family is not the funniest show on TV, despite what the Emmys say, but it is easy entertainment. Basically, it's Arrested Development without theor . You turn it on, have your laughs, enjoy the half hour, and then completely forget everything that happened. It's a show that doesn't require hyper-focus: you can answer e-mails while it's going on or chop some broccoli and not really miss anything important. Just plug AP into your lineup and keep him there until he goes on bye, no need to ever really think about it.
BRANDON MARSHALL IS TWIN PEAKS
Twin Peaks is intriguing, terrific and just plain weird. Like when people watch me run sprints on a treadmill for half an hour only to see me pull my pack of cigs out of the cup holder, walk out the door and hack a dart as my cool down. Beats a 5-minute walk. They honestly have no idea what's going on. Outside of me having serious issues, of course. That's basically BRANDON MARSHALL. He's flighty, and perpetually plagued by spurts of wacky behavior. Frankly, I wouldn't be stunned if that weird shadow floating on the curtain in the "" was actually just B-Marsh. I feel like he'd fit right in with Coop, the Man from Another Place and Laura Palmer's doppelganger, as long as he enjoyed a crisp cup of black coffee, one blacker than a moonless night. Which I'm sure he does, because really, who doesn't? Or maybe he was simply the soul occupying the .
Another shared trait? Quality. Even at its worst - like Marshall's Miami adventure - Twin Peaks was still pretty great. And when it hit, it went off. And don't underplay the similarities between the enigmatic puppet masters sitting at the helm: David Lynch and JAY CUTLER are both distant, capricious and !
DWAYNE BOWE IS ENTOURAGE
It was once good, briefly, and everyone stuck with it just waiting for the turnaround that never materialized.
Tom Brady is The Wire
Peyton Manning is The Sopranos
AARON RODGERS IS MAD MEN
When we're talking high-end, prestige, only the best will do. Debuting in the late-90s, The Sopranos stormed onto our screens and revolutionized television. It gained instant notoriety, accolades and became ubiquitous in culture. Well, maybe not as much as PEYTON MANNING. Every Sunday, there's a 66.2-percent chance that Peyton is concurrently appearing in at least two different commercials at any given moment between all the games. He's everywhere. And he too generated similar hype upon entering the league, claiming awards shortly thereafter.
TOM BRADY followed The Wire model, beginning as complete unknown, only to immediately vault himself into the elite over the course of one season. Some thought Brady was a fluke. No way he could replicate that type of performance again. When the Patriots failed to make the playoffs the following year questions were raised about Brady's ceiling, mirroring The Wire's sophomore excursion form the projects to the docks. Both underrated seasons in retrospect. Then Brady won back-to-back Super Bowls and The Wire executed two of greatest seasons in the history of the medium. A stretch guaranteeing both a spot in the Hall of Fame.
When it looked like another show would never come along to join the Sopranos/Wire class, here comes Mad Menand its perpetually passed over star, residing on the "small market" of cable, AMC. Being hidden away on a channel in the 400s actually worked in its favor. There wasn't immediate pressure, but once people got a glimpse, they were in. And, it's one of the few programs ever that has basically been as good or better as it's gone on. It's clearAARON RODGERS is the heir apparent to Brady and Manning at his position, and at different points of their careers, they've all been considered "the best quarterback in the game" - both in real life and in Fantasy.
Peyton had the title for a bit, then Brady wrestled it loose and eventually Rodgers came and knocked them both out. But just how The Sopranos has gained momentum again as the "greatest show ever", the resurgent Manning has currently been playing that way himself. It won't last though; by season's end it's Rodgers you'll want. He'll ultimately be better. The way the Broncos are rolling at the moment, it wouldn't be shocking to see Peyton take a two-week vacation when you need him. Delivering a Sopranos-esque blow to your championship hopes.
RASHAD JENNINGS IS THE BLACKLIST
I hadn't really heard much about either until this week. But there certainly seems like a lot hype behind it right now. My expectations for The Blacklist may actually be lower than the floor of the Mariana Trench, mainly because it's on NBC. It's equivalent to how no one thinks RASHAD JENNINGS can't be useful because he's on the awful Raiders. But TERRELLE PRYOR could be a tremendous asset to Jennings' productivity - he possess something I like to call "". James Spader is terrific. Not always given "Grade-A" material to work with, but he always puts a unique spin on all of it and, for the most part, enhances everyone around him.
While Oakland doesn't win games, Pryor's ability to remain upright behind that sieve of an offensive line - serious, I've never seen such big people take up so little space - does give the rest of The Raiders' skill players an opportunity to post points. DARREN MCFADDEN wasn't necessarily having a good year before the injury, but his Fantasy numbers were incredibly stable. Jennings is going to get the ball, I'm not overly concerned with a banged up MARCEL REECE shouldering too much of the load, so he's worth a shot. And who knows, Spader may actually make The Blacklist a watchable affair, but both only get one shot to make me believe.
DOUG MARTIN IS HOMELAND
Remember DOUG MARTIN'S rookie season? Off the charts awesome. Causing some to, moronically, draft him over Peterson as the first player taken in Fantasy drafts. People bought into Homeland the same way. The first season was shockingly good. Or so we thought. On closer inspection, while being fairly consistent, it really just had a few "Holy Shit" moments everyone remembers. Martin was its clone, scoring over 40-percent of his yearly point in three games.
It's not all entirely his fault however, as Homeland's creators are completely to blame for its downturn. Showtime stepped in and changed the course of the plot so the star could still be prominently featured. But it wasn't the same. He had no purpose and was eventually told to go away. His character was actively hurting the show.
JOSH FREEMAN has been on a precipitous decline since last November. Starting with a 27-21 overtime win against the Panthers; the victory masked his poor play. Starting with that game, Freeman's posted a QB-Rating above 80 just once, and he didn't even toss a TD in that loss to The Falcons. Now Freeman too as been placed on the sidelines like Brody, giving both Martin and Homeland an opening to actually live up to their initial press. Week one didn't go well for either, and if they remain at this quality for another two weeks, I'll officially give up hope.
MARK INGRAM IS SONS OF ANARCHY
Because they both suck.
RILEY COOPER IS ALL IN THE FAMILY
Because I like easy jokes.
JEROME SIMPSON IS THE UNTITLED PAT MAYO PROJECT
Because I'm the only person who is intrigued by either.
C.J. SPILLER IS SIX FEET UNDER
Six Feet Under is rollercoaster of emotions. Some weeks it's a literal crack high other weeks it will send out into a deep state of depression. But you let its sinus curve of watchability dissuade you from watching, because it hits its highest peak at the very last moment. But be warned, it's certainly not for everyone. You want to be riding the momentum of watching back-to-back great series coming before watching, you'll need to have built up patience. Ditto for C.J. SPILLER. He's going to be frustrating working through his injuries and the new offense that just doesn't seem to fit himyet. Of course, he's no lock to turn it around, so if your team's stumbled out of the gates early, probably best to avoid. But, if you currently sit 4-0 or 3-1, Spiller's the type of upside risk that can give your season the best ending possible.
DARREN SPROLES IS THE X-FILES
DARREN SPROLES contributes in weird ways: running, receiving and returning. And, he's established himself, along with DANNY WOODHEAD, as premier genre players - they are far more credible within the PPR game. Just like X-Filesdid with Sci-Fi. It was an above average series, but against its own genre it was one a level of it's own, mainly due to its proclivity of churning outmultiple times a year. But overall, it was consistent procedural, not unlike Law & Order: SVU, that played up to its odd theme, always outperforming its perception.
It had help, though. Where Sproles has DREW BREES & Sean Payton activity working to put him in the right spots to excel. X-Files had Mr. Breaking Bad himself, Vince Gilligan thinking up storylines. Homeland creators Alex Gansa and Howard Gordon were staffers too. Not to mention the crazy schemes the likely-deranged, and darkly hysterical Darin Morgan would . But it didn't matter who was propping it up after David Duchovny, when the talent bolts, it's an abyss from which nothing can escape. Once Sproles loses even a modicum of lateral quickness, he's finished. Don't think it happens this year, but like Mulder's abrupt exit, those skills can demilitarize at any moment.
KHIRY ROBINSON IS BEAVIS AND BUTTHEAD
They both share the key to .
SHANE VEREEN IS LIFE AND TIMES OF TIM
The insane antics hard-luck Tim and his crazy crew of cartoon counterparts are the perfect stash. There's only three seasons and each episode is just two, 11-minute shorts. You can bang out the entire thing in short order - it's a quick hitter. SHANE VEREEN can provide the same short-term appeal. You'll only get him for a brief period, but that's all you'll need to be satisfied. Only difference, now is the time to check out Vereen, where as any time is the right time for some Tim. We're far enough away from his breakout Week 1, and equally distant from his return that his value will probably be as low as it ever gets. AndI've heard he may be , and when people find that out there's not shot you'll be able to pry him away.
Julio Jones is Shaq Vs
RODDY WHITE IS PROS VS JOES
Shaq Vs featured Shaq taking on a string of athletes at the peaks of their powers. Like when he ! It was stylish, smooth and significantly better than its look-a-like. That's JULIO JONES.
Pros vs Joes was clearly working on a sizably smaller budget, thus they could only attract washed up athletes, clearly past their prime. Every now and then they'll score a big, napping giant current names - like the episode with Antonio Gates, Terrell Owens and Donovan McNabb. But that rarely happens. Overall, it's significantly worse. That would be RODDY WHITE.
DAVID WILSON IS THE OFFICE (UK) & (USA)
Whether it's Jim and Pam or Tim and Dawn, David Wilson has the same "will-they, won't they" potential in him. But mostly, whenever you start him, you just sit there and cringe watching the awfulness unfolding slowly in front of you. You see it unfolding, but there's nothing that can stop it. Like when Michael Scott invites his co-workers orfor charity. That's what happens when you fuseFlashdance with MC Hammer
Sidebar: I figured out the perfect value of player I'd be willing to give up to gamble on Wilson: STEVIE JOHNSON. A low end WR2, that is ultimately replaceable. That would be all I'd be willing to give.
SUPERLOCK OF THE WEEK
DET/GB ( o55)
STREAM DEFENSE OF THE WEEK
1. ATL D/ST vs NYJ
2. CLE D/ST vs BUF
3. STL D/ST vs JAX
4. CAR D/ST at ARZ
OUT OF OPTIONS STREAM DEFENSE OF THE WEEK
TEN D/ST vs KC
WEEK 5 QB RANKS
WEEK 5 QB RANKS: 1 Rodgers 2 Peyton 3 Stafford 4 Brees 5 THE RIV 6 Vick 7 CAAAAAAAM 8 Kaepernick 9 Ryan 10 Eli 11 Romo 12 Brady 13 BradfordWEEK 5 QB RANKS (con't) 14 Pryor 15 Tannehill 16 Hoyer 17 Cutler 18 Luck 19 R Wilson 20 Dalton 21 Flacco 22 A Smith 23 SchaubSUICIDE LAY UP LOCK
ATL over NYJ
EARLY GAME WATCHABILITY INDEX
1. NO/CHI
2. DET/GB
3. NE/CIN
4. PHI/NYG
5. BAL/MIA
6. SEA/IND
7. KC/TEN
8. JAC/STL
#THROWBACKTRACK
The new iPhone software update, iOS 7, has been . Like when it deleted my entire music libraryexcept "Return of the Mack".
FUN FACT: In my grade-six fashion show, "The History of Dance", this song played at the ending when everyone came onto stage, in full costume from their era, to perform the one dance we learned. Logically, I was an 80s break dancer. Decked out in complete Run DMC gear: Chain, wide brimmed fedora, track jacket, dark jeans, fresh Adidas kicks.
I looked fly.
Unfortunately, 11-year-old me lacked the proper co-ordination to pull off any actual break dancing moves. I finished with an "SD", significant difficulties, in rhythm class that year. So they made up a move for me called the "cabbage roll". I now know it was a fabrication after a Google search couldn't provide any answers, which reminded me of that ancient Chinese proverb: "If Google's never heard of it, does it actually exist?" Basically, I sat in aposition and slowly rotated 360-degrees.could do a backspin. I'm convinced that's why his construction paper box was always overrun with Valentine's Day cards every February.
So anyway, I'm dominating the dance floor during this Mark Morrison jam and I unknowingly veered a bit too close to the edge of the stageand "Cabbage Rolled" off. Next thing I remember? Plummeting to my death. (SPOILER ALERT): This column is not a string of posthumous predictions.
I was snagged mid-freefall by the teacher running the event. It was quite a grab. And, it created a lasing memory for all involved. So much so, I still break it out every Christmas when I'm homeit remains underwhelming.
In conclusion, give "Return of the Mack" a listen, it's a legit track!
QUICK READS
Miami doesn't cover TEs and I'm pretty sure DALLAS CLARK is universally available.
Philly has allowed team's WR2s to explode thus far. Expect HAKEEM NICKS to , at least for one week.
Don't sleep on DONNIE AVERY's targets. After leading the team against the Eagles, he did it against last week, but it only translated into 2 receptions, so no one noticed. Monitor his looks because he could soon be more valuable than DWAYNE BOWE.
TORREY SMITH will be grinding against the Dolphins. Miami's yet to allow a WR to find the end zone against them.The Rams have given up at least 25 Fantasy points to an opposing running back three straight weeks. This is the matchup to trust MAURICE JONES-DREW. It he blows it, I'm completely over him.
KELLEN WILSON was the one who benefited from the loss of SANTONIO HOLMES and STEPHEN HILL in Week 4, notJEREMY KERELY or CLYDE GATES. Don't see any change happening in Week 5.
I know EDDIE LACY'S back, but never forget, the Packers hate running. Plus, I have a gut-feeling this anotherJOHNATHAN FRANKLIN big game in the passing game.
JULIAN EDELMAN is still a good play, even with DANNY AMENDOLA active. If he has a bad game, buy low.
CHRIS JOHNSON stinks. The Chiefs run D does not. Bench CJ2K if you can. Then walk up to him and say, "Chris, you're sittin this week. Go get those ridiculous dreads shaved off and then go find that thing you use to have, you know, talent"
WEEK 5 RANKS
(Rankings & injuries spin updated Saturday & Pregame Sunday morning)
Points per reception (PPR) scoring must be treated differently than standard leagues. Receivers and scat backs like DARREN SPROLES, DANNY WOODHEAD and ROY HELU have inflated value in PPR scoring. As do possession receivers - WES WELKER, DANNY AMENDOLA and others in their mold are safer options. Catches tend to be more consistent and predictive. Obviously, touchdowns and yards are still important, but when considering FLEX options exploit any advantage you can. For standard scoring, running backs with hands of stone like ALFRED MORRIS, BENJARVIS GREEN-ELLIS and STEVAN RIDLEY all see their stocks rise without catches in the mix.
NOT RANKED BECAUSE OF INJURY: Darren McFadden, Ahmad Bradshaw, Rob Gronkowski, Miles Austin, Santonio Holmes, Stephen Hill, Lance Moore
BYE, BYE, BYES: Pittsburgh, Tampa Bay, Minnesota, Washington
* Calvin Johnson
* LESEAN MCCOY
* MATT FORTE
* Jimmy Graham
* Julio Jones
* Dez Bryant
* A.J. Green
* REGGIE BUSH
* DEMARCO MURRAY
* Demaryius Thomas
* MARSHAWN LYNCH
* JAMAAL CHARLES
* Randall Cobb
* DeSean Jackson
* Wes Welker
* Brandon Marshall
* Victor Cruz
* DARREN SPROLES
* RAY RICE
* FRANK GORE
* ARIAN FOSTER
* Hakeem Nicks
* Andre Johnson
* Eric Decker
* Jordy Nelson
* MAURICE JONES-DREW
* BILAL POWELL
* Cecil Shorts
* Josh Gordon
* Jordon Cameron
* Marques Colston
* Steve Smith
* Larry Fitzgerald
* DANNY WOODHEAD
* Reggie Wayne
* Julius Thomas
* Antonio Gates
* Tony Gonzalez
* Danny Amendola
* DEANGELO WILLIAMS
* GIOVANI BERNARD
* Kenbrell Thomkins
* Julian Edelman
* Anquan Boldin
* Martellus Bennett
* Jason Witten
* KNOWSHON MORENO
* RASHAD JENNINGS
* DAVID WILSON
* TRENT RICHARDSON
* James Jones
* Dwayne Bowe
* Brian Hartline
* JOIQUE BELL
* Mike Wallace
* Stevie Johnson
* JACQUIZZ RODGERS
* PIERRE THOMAS
* C.J. SPILLER
* LAMAR MILLER
* CHRIS JOHNSON
* Torrey Smith
* Greg Olsen
* Vernon Davis
* Kellen Winslow
* Austin Pettis
* DeAndre Hopkins
* STEVAN RIDLEY
* RYAN MATHEWS
* T.Y. Hilton
* Nate Washington
* Robert Woods
* Dallas Clark
* Denarius Moore
* Eddie Royal
* EDDIE LACY
* FRED JACKSON
* JASON SNELLING
* Tavon Austin
* Jeremy Kerely
* Brandon Gibson
* Alshon Jeffery
* Justin BlackMON
* Terrance Williams
* Coby Fleener
* Charles "Dice" Clay
* Owen Daniels
* Jermichael Finley
* Brandon LaFell SEXUAL
* Chris Givens
* Michael Floyd
* Golden Tate
* Davone Bess
* Donnie Avery
* Brandon Myers
* Kyle Rudolph
* Jared Cook
* CHRIS OGBONNAYA
* Harry Douglas
* Aaron Dobson
* Roddy White
* JOHNATHAN FRANKIN
* Riley Cooper
* Mohamed Sanu
* BENJARVUS GREEN-ELLIS
* ANDRE ELLINGTON
* WILLIS MCGAHEE
* Sidney Rice
* Ryan Broyles
* DARYL RICHARDSON
* BRYCE BROWN
* Marlon Brown
* Darrius Heyward-Bey
* BERNARD PIERCE
* RASHARD MENDENHALL
* MICHAEL BUSH
* Andre Roberts
* Kenny Stills
* Doug Baldwin
* Rod Streater
* BEN TATE
* KENDALL HUNTER
* Tandon Doss
* Reuben Randle
* Jason Avant
* Brandon Pettigrew
* Tyler Eifert
* Delanie Walker
* Zac Stacy
* DONALD BROWN
* DANIEL THOMAS
* Kendall Wright
* Robert Meachem
* BRANDON BOLDEN
* RONNIE HILLMAN
* RONNIE BROWN
* Vincent Brown
* Keenan Allen
* MIKE TOLBERT
* LEGARRETTE BLOUNT
* JORDAN TODMAN
* Scott Chandler
* Jordon Reed
* BENNY CUNNINGHAM
* ROBERT TURBIN
* Brent Celek
* Jermaine Gresham
* Rob Housler
* BRANDON JACOBS
* Greg Little
WORST PLACE: Mark Ingram
Second Worst Place: Montee Ball
HOW'D YOU MISS
Mayo's Week 4 Injury Report
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